Blank Dice Eyes
by curlyflowers
Summary: If her eyes were dice, what were the chances we'd be together still if I rolled them?


The way I was going with this fic was to NOT make it a narrative, but eh, shit happens. Snow naturally had to reminisce, so I let him. Please tell me what you think. Thank you.

-Marissa

**Blank Dice Eyes **

The ebb and flow was just too disturbing. Anarchy was overflowing and the cure for the common cold was as latent as the solution for this disruption. I tried to allow your breathing to distract my thoughts, but it failed as an escapism. Inhale, exhale. Huff, hah... Slumber, please kidnap me.

I brushed your candy cloud hair from your face and stroked your warm cheeks. Then I focused my eyes on your milky collarbones, which cradled the engagement necklace I bought you. The shine of the orb sat upon the waves of navy blue that we rest our bodies upon. I held it and stroked it carefully in the palm of my right hand. Time was trying to deceive me, and being a fool, it succeeded. How had nostalgia created a fissure in my heart? I whispered your name and threw the covers over my head, lightly butting my forehead against yours. The guilt in my caress removed a gear from my soul, slowing down my actions and throwing me into darkness.

She was only 17. I heard some rumors about a cute girl, and my buddies wanted to hook me up. She apparently had pink hair and dressed in a red plaid skirt and white vest. They told me she frequents Lebreau's bar around the afternoon when the sun sets, so I decided to investigate this unknown cutie.

The bar was unusually busy today, a motley bunch of people. Although there was this huge group of guys surrounding something..or someone...?

"Sweetheart, why don't you just let us take care of your tab for you."

"No...um...I'm fine...really..."

"C'mon girlie...you won't even owe me much..."

At that point, a drink went flying and decorated the gang of men. A girl in the middle of them pushed an opening between them and turned to face all of them.

"Listen, I don't need anyone to cover for me. Everything I do is for myself, and no one needs to help me with anything. Got that?"

She caught my heart in an instant. Something hit my subconscious. Didn't know what, but signals interconnected in my head and spotlights shined upon this girl's head. Nothing would suit this moment better than a rendezvous with her.

"Okay girlie, you're not getting anymore options anymore. C'mon guys let's teach this girl..."

"Teach her what? A better way to kick your ass?"

I sprang in and nailed the leader of the gang in the back of his skull. His friends began to attack me, but I slid behind them and punched their lights out. A few I simply elbowed them in the chest, while others I had to chop behind the neck or back. After a few more movements with my arms and legs, they all fell to the floor and groaned.

"Snow, what just happened?"

Lebreau blinked in awe while I explained.

"Just gave some losers the old 1, 2, leave a pretty girl alone."

The girl just looked at me plainly. We just looked at each other until she finally got out some words.

"Thank you for...that. I wish I could repay you somehow, but I have nothing else on me. I'm sorry. Goodbye."

As she started walking away, I shouted, "W-wait there! I don't need anything but, can I at least talk to you? I actually... wanted to meet you."

Her eyes were a mix of confusion and disinterest: two blue circles on a blank white side of a dice. She pursed her lips to begin a thought, but then stopped. Then opened them again, only to close them. She was so cute.

"Mister, whoever you are, I don't need a hero, all right? And don't worry, this is the only time this has ever happened. You have no need to protect me. I'm fine by myself."

This girl clearly put up a front. She was protecting herself from other forces she knew I couldn't possibly control. Something intangible was bothering her, and I could be the tangible thing to help her.

She began to walk away when I managed to get out, "...what if this happens again? Then can you count on me?"

She turned around swiftly and opened those empty eyes. Those empty, empty eyes. Eyes. Her eyes. They finally had life in them. Her pupils finally carried some weight in them.

"But, you won't see me again. How can you be sure that you'll save me again? You're too cocky for your own good-"

"Cause I fell hard. I'm a big guy, so naturally I fell hard.I... can't seem to get you out of my head. And now, I can't seem to leave you alone. C'mon, I'm not doing anything negative here. I can be all yours if you need me to be."

Her movements startled me as she walked towards me quickly. The frown on her face left a quaking in my heart. Oh God, what was she going to do? I'm such an idiot. It was over.

"...maybe."

What?

"Huh? What did you say?"

"...You would have to be dedicated to me. I'll let you do whatever, but, just don't leave. Temporarily, momentarily, nothing like that. Because eventually, everyone does. They appear and then like a gust of wind, they're gone. Without any memento. You have to make an oath... to never desert me...if we do happen to meet again."

I was past the point of interest; past the point of intrigue, curiosity, unhealthy habit. This girl had me hooked to whatever story she was going to tell. I know she was trying to discourage me; trying to create another barrier I couldn't penetrate by loading me up with pre-baggage I didn't want to carry. But hey, I was a strong guy. It's a man's job to carry the lady's weights, whether they be on her shoulder, or on her mind.

I walked close to her; so close that no ruler could measure the seemingly microscopic distance. Leaning into those full eyes, I began my promise.

"I will never leave you. I can't even understand who would want to leave someone like you. You can see me here, right? In front of you, making this promise? That I will never go back on. You can use me as you want, because I know a person like you would put me to good use."

Heaven was real. I could feel it. Then I realized it was the smile on her face. It sang of hope and trust, a long future to come. The beauty had accepted my embrace and let me step into her unraveling story. I was so excited to read and hear her words.

She held out her hand and said,"Serah. And you?" There was a slight giggle in her voice that reddened my cheeks.

I shook her hand and slightly caressed it as I let go.

"Snow, like the stuff that never shows up around here."

"Well you're here now. J-Just, don't get comfortable with me just yet! Hmph, who knows when we'll meet again."

I smiled mischievously and turned slowly. Putting my hands in my pockets, I strode away, muttering under my breath, "We'll see about that."

I hugged your body close to mine and buried my nose in your head. Your hair smelled of New Bodum's fresh air; circulating like the memories of us in my mind. I know you love me, but just what was I doing? Every thought I wanted to verbalize was washed away by the salt water of uncertainty. I have to save Lightning. You know my heroism is a terrible condition I have no prescription for. Plus, you know how much I love you. I can't just lie here with ease. Insomnia is an enemy I just can't take down. Your blank, dice eyes have returned to my head. I keep rolling them in my hands, although I know it's matter what I do, they are blank.

Serah, I can only imagine what will happen when I tell you, "I'm leaving."


End file.
